What if they don’t eat enough green vegetables?
Wait. Now, they’re not eating nutritious food or exercising enough!
How am I going to make sure they are fit enough?
What about their education? Are they learning enough?
Ok, but what is enough?
I will make sure they are independent enough.
Oh no, they can’t do this if they don’t know how to do enough. Like laundry, cooking, managing money…
I must not have given them enough responsibility.
I’m not doing enough.
I’m not giving enough.
I must not be enough.
In order to get off of this rotating cycle of guilt and inadequacy, I have realized these thoughts are pure bullarky. In fact, all of them have been proven wrong, again and again. My children teach me everyday that they are really not subject to any of my bizarre delusions of controlling them. They are completely separate from me. Thank God.
God is the author of their souls, the caretaker of their hearts, and not me. The sooner I realize that, the happier they will be.
I must direct my children to seek their nourishment, knowledge and care from a source which will never run out: The Holy Spirit. His sufficiency is unending. I remain painfully inadeaquate here–and that’s O.K. by me. My dependence on Him to help me mother is the only hope for adequacy. My moral obligation is to love and care for my children in so much as I am able. I remind myself of that daily with cooking meals and making sure they wear their seatbelts.
Their Heavenly Father will love them more. More than enough. More than I could possibly know.
2 Corinthians 12:9
And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
How will you choose to turn off the cycle of mothering guilt?